by Shawn | Mar 19, 2021 | Podcast
B25… BINGO!  I was amazed when I found out a hidden fact about BINGO, but it clued me in to something that happens a lot in business as well: we don’t see the whole board! Â
Sometimes, our eyes can deceive us. We may think we have all the information in front of us… but we’re really missing something.
And usually, when that happens, we make bad decisions or we feel the wrong way about a situation we’re in.
But if we knew the whole story, we might think differently.
I was reminded of this one time with a simple game of BINGO.
You ever played BINGO? Pretty straightforward, right?
You’ve got a sheet that’s got 25 squares on it and then five letters across the top: B-I-N-G-O.
Each square has a number and when your letter and number is called, you get to cross off that square.
All you have to do… is get five squares in a row in any orientation… and you win!
Well, I was playing BINGO and had my board and was ready to go. Number after number began to get called. “B3″… “G60″… “N32”.
At first I had a couple matches and crossed them off. Things we’re looking pretty good for a victory.
But then, as the letters and numbers continued to be drawn… every… single… one was missing from my board.
I was looking at the list of drawn numbers as it continued to grow and then staring blankly at my mostly empty board.
“How is this possible?” I asked myself. How could so many numbers be drawn that weren’t on my board?
Eventually, someone else won and I accepted defeat. But I needed answers, darn it! So, I went to the Google.
As it turns out that the 25 squares shown on anyone’s board are only ONE THIRD of the total.
There are actually 75 total squares and fifteen numbers for each column, even though any board only shows five.
It all started to make a little more sense at that point.
I was frustrated because I didn’t have all the information.
I felt like I should have won three times already when, in actuality, my chances of winning were still fairly low because of all the extra numbers that I couldn’t see.
And the same is true for you and I. Every day, there is a lot that we don’t see. Every time we’re faced with a decision to make. Every email we get ready to reply to. Every customer complaint or quality issue that we try to get to the bottom of….
Assume that each one is actually a BINGO board with squares that are missing. There is more to the story.
So don’t let your eyes or the information you’ve been given lie to you. Take a minute to consider what might not be visible right now and put in the work to find out those other details.
You’ll save yourself a lot of stress on the back end.
And… next time you play BINGO, just make sure you get the board with the right numbers to start with.
I hope you’ve been getting value from these episodes. If you have, I’d love it if you left a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or your favorite player. It truly means a lot and lets me help even more people. Thanks so much.
by Shawn | Mar 17, 2021 | Podcast
Have you ever cooked pancakes?
At our house, we love making things from scratch when we can, but we’ve also used those pre-made mixes as well.
The images on the side of the box just make my mouth water. That huge stack of pancakes with the butter slightly melting on top and the syrup slowly dripping down along all of the edges and ending a pool of brown sugary goodness on the plate.
So, you open the box, measure out the mix, add water, mix together in a bowl and there you go. Pancakes. Right?
Well, for some reason, that creamy liquid in the bowl doesn’t quite resemble what I see on the package.
Why?
Because they aren’t pancakes… yet.
They obviously still need to be cooked on a skillet to become that delicious meal that you’ve already imagined devouring in your mind.
Yet.
I’ve really come to love that word.
I love it because, with just three little letters it packs an incredible punch.
It speaks of potential, of what could be. It breaks through barriers, both mental and physical.
Yet is a powerful word and should be added into our vocabulary more often.
Think of any of the barriers or limitations that you feel in your business. Many of them may feel definitive. They may just feel like how things are now and how they’re going to be in the future. There might be even a hopelessness regarding any change to the what things will look like down the road.
Maybe you’re struggling with a team member who just isn’t grasping something. A skill. A company value. Communication. You’re starting to believe that it’s just not going to work out with them.
And maybe you’re right. If you’ve done your due diligence and gone out of your way to try to understand and help, it’s possible that they just aren’t a good fit.
But before you throw in the towel, try using “yet” a little bit more in your company language.
Instead of “she just isn’t able to make rate”, add “…yet” at the end. And let yet guide you with questions like “what would have to happen to get her there?”. Maybe it’s a training issue. Maybe some miscommunication. Maybe struggles at home. If she has the desire, yet opens the door to further explore what might be missing.
Yet is like a foot that keeps a door from closing. It forces us to rethink, to explore, to question. Maybe it’s your people, maybe it’s a machine or process or software that isn’t cutting it right now.
Before you give up on it, let yet give you the push to dig a little deeper.
And in pushing deeper, you might, indeed find that the door should be shut. But you’ll have given yourself the chance to exhaust all options first with the hope that there is still value there that can be unearthed.
So where can you use yet this week? As you look at the challenges you’re facing, try adding it more into your vocabulary and see how it shifts the conversation.
As for those pancakes, they aren’t totally eaten… yet. But if you don’t hurry up and grab the last stack they will be.
I hope you’ve been getting value from these episodes. If you have, I’d love it if you left a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or your favorite player. It truly means a lot and lets me help even more people. Thanks so much.
Thanks for listening to today’s episode.
by Shawn | Mar 15, 2021 | Podcast
Humans are wired in pretty unique, amazing ways. One of those is the different ways in which we receive love.  Find out why understanding your love language and the languages of your team members is so important.  And find out more about the Five Love Languages at 5lovelanguages.com Â
We were made to be loved. Each one of us.
You. Me. Your family. Friends. Team members. The Amazon Prime driver. Even… the person who cut you off in traffic… that you “loved” with your horn and a hand signal.
Each one of us has been designed with a deep desire to be loved, appreciated, valued, needed and so much more.
I love the visual that I first heard about from my daughter’s school years ago.
They talked about being a bucket filler in the lives of others, pouring into their bucket as we loved them in various ways.
But have you ever wondered why some of your efforts to show love or appreciation might fall flat on one person but be gobbled up by another?
Or maybe you’ve experienced tension with a spouse or friend who has been trying to show you love… but you’re just not feeling it.
Years ago, I first heard about a concept that has been transformational in my life and in the lives of so many others.
It is the idea of love languages.
Now, I’m sure there have been variations of the concept dating back through history, but I love how Dr. Gary Chapman pulled it all together in his book The Five Love Languages.
After reading that book, it was like I saw everything in a totally different light. So much made sense about me, about others. About my wife and kids. Friends. Coworkers.
You see, Dr. Chapman explains that there are five fundamental ways that we give and receive love, and that we have a few primary love languages and then some that aren’t as pronounced. You can find out more at his website 5lovelanguages.com
Here are the five: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time and Physical Touch.
The whole thing is actually pretty amazing when you start to dig into it. Almost like looking at a secret code with special lenses and seeing what you couldn’t see before… even though it was right in front of you.
For each of us, one or two of these will be the main ways that we receive or feel love best, whereas the others might not pack the same punch.
For example, I’m a big Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch guy. So, for me, words of genuine appreciation or praise (and I emphasize the word genuine here – I despise ata boys) go a long way to fill my bucket. Just below that would be physical touch. And that could be a hug, fist bump, an arm on the shoulder, etc.
But the other languages don’t carry as much weight. I love spending time with people I care about, I like when someone does something nice for me and I like getting gifts. But for whatever reason, none of those fill my bucket like the top two.
Then, there is the flip side – how we give love the best. Sometimes it’s the same languages that we like to receive. Other times it’s different. Think about which of those five really make you come alive when you’re wanting to show someone else you care about them. Maybe it’s writing a note of encouragement, doing something for them in secret, buying the perfect gift, just being with them or holding them.
The bottom line is that this is a huge concept to grasp and can transform your relationships at home, at work and elsewhere.
At work, once you understand better how your team members and coworkers receive love best, it not only helps you get to know them on a deeper level but it also helps you maximize your efforts to appreciate them using the languages that really resonate with each one.
So, a great place to start is for you to take the love language quiz at 5lovelanguages.com. It will give you an idea of what your top languages are and help you better understand yourself.
Then, you could try having some of your team members take one as well and discuss your findings.
I think you’ll find it pretty eye-opening and putting this new knowledge into practice can go a long way to helping hang on to quality people as well as create a culture that attracts new talent as well.
by Shawn | Mar 8, 2021 | Podcast
What if we are coming in 45 minutes late into the stories of those around us? What if we believed that there is more to them than we know?
That what has happened in their lives has shaped how they view the world, how they interact, their hopes and fears. Â If we approach our coworkers, family and friends with that mindset we can understand them better and more deeply, as well as being able to work better together and give them more of what they need.
Have you ever arrived late for a movie at a movie theater?
If you have, if it was less than fifteen minutes late, you probably were alright since you only missed the ads for upcoming movies. That’s just how it is these days.
But imagine coming in 45 minutes late to a movie. 45 minutes after the actual movie had started.
You’d be like “wait, who is this Frodo guy, why is he so short, and why doesn’t he just throw that ring in the river?” or “What made Darth so angry, why is breathing so heavy and why do I feel like he has some deep family issues?” or even “Wait, Matt Damon is stuck again somewhere in the universe and needs to be rescued? I think I’ve seen this before somewhere…”
You get the picture. So much is revealed in the beginning of a movie. Something tragic happens. Or there is a snapshot from a character’s past. Or a chance meeting takes place or a message is shared.
A good movie will still leave some things for you to figure out. But what is shared at the beginning often fills in a lot of the blanks of the story. If you miss it, you will be led to figure the story out on your own. You’ll draw conclusions about characters or their decisions. You’ll falsely assume things to be true or not based on your limited knowledge. And often you’ll be wrong.
With a movie there’s no major implications here, other than you peppering the people who are watching with you with all kinds of questions that would have been answered if you hadn’t been late!
But with people, it’s a much different story.
And yet this happens all the time we meet someone new.
Every time our paths cross another’s, we’re coming into their life 45 minutes late. And even if we’ve been friends forever, there are still details about their past that we may never know but that have shaped who they are.
It’s not that we need to know every detail of everyone we meet. But acknowledging that we’re coming in late to their story allows us to be aware that their past has in part made them into who they are now. And by past, this could even mean what happened this morning before they left for work.
When you think about those you rub shoulders with every day, whether your peers or team members, the more you can view them and their stories in this way, the more it can help you have more compassion and understanding as well as a vision for their potential as well.
Instead of jumping to conclusions about their behavior or how they missed the mark, consider asking them more about what led to that. If they feel that you are genuine and can trust you, you can begin to fill in more blanks of the story. And THAT is when you can begin to make a deeper connection, see how you can help them and what they need from you to perform at their best.
All you need to remember is this one phrase: “I don’t know their whole story”.
That’s it.
This doesn’t mean that even after you dig deeper and try to help them that they might not still make bad decisions or refuse to do things that are needed to get where you need them to be. Tough decisions and conversations are still bound to happen.
But you have a better chance to connect with and hang onto those teammates who are the types of people you want in your organization.
That person who perhaps is on your mind as you listen to this? Why not take some time this week to reach out to them, dig deeper and let them fill in more of their story to you.
As for Frodo and the ring, don’t worry. You’ll fill in all those blanks you missed if you’ve got another 8 hours on your hands. Matt Damon though? Might have to just let that guy go…
Thanks for listening to today’s episode.
I can’t wait to connect with you again tomorrow
by Shawn | Mar 5, 2021 | Podcast
A positive and healthy work culture should be the foundation that you can build upon in your business. But toxicity can creep in in a number of ways and threaten to disrupt and dismantle your core.
Toxic.
Unlike some words, it’s not one that I’ve ever heard to have an alternate or opposite meaning.
I mean, it’s not like fat or sick or… I don’t know… “juicy”. Actually, I don’t know if juicy has some other meaning but if any word would it would probably be something like juicy. “Dude, that car is sooo juicy”
Not toxic, though.
You never hear “toxic” and think something positive. Toxic waste. Toxic relationships. Toxic environments. Yep, all of those convey something that has a stench about it. Something you want to stay away from.
And the same is true with a toxic company culture.
If you’ve ever worked somewhere with a toxic culture, there was just an icky feeling about it. I know I’ve experienced it. Things just seem a little… or sometimes a lot… off. Overt favoritism, lack of communication, mistreatment, buddy-buddy relationships, back-door dealings, lack of trust, people treated like robots and more.
Often the toxicity is clear and evident and everyone can see it. But sometimes it’s more hidden.
One thing is for sure though. It is never good for a company and will eventually drive out the types of people you want to attract.
Because of my bent toward relationships and people, culture has also been a huge part of what I’ve observed and seeked to change and improve in the places I’ve worked. When there is truly an openness to making things better, there is hope. When management really values their people, you can see a difference.
If you’ve ever been someplace with a killer culture, you can just tell. There is a positive peer pressure that comes down from the top. There is an overriding understanding that “this” is how we treat people here. Each person is valuable, listened to, respected, understood, encouraged, equipped. And when people come in that don’t fit that culture, they stand out because the don’t mesh with those cultural attributes.
It’s really refreshing to be a part of.
A solid culture provides stability, freedom of thought, security and trust. It allows your people to bring their ideas, goals, thoughts out into the open. They can be vulnerable. They are able to fail and try again without fear. They can trust that they will be treated fairly, given a chance to grow and advance.
Not only does a healthy work culture reduce stress and provide a better atmosphere for your team, it also makes you more efficient as a company and better able to provide those goods and services to your customers with less weighing you down.
Think of a football team. If there is infighting, mistrust, lack of communication, favorites, etc. they are just not going to be able to get the job done. Inevitably, when push comes to shove each will revert back to protecting their own interests because they feel no one is protecting theirs. You’ve seen with teams with poor cultures. Players sulking on the sidelines, ignoring coaches, yelling at each other, shoving others under the bus instead of taking responsibility.
It leads to each looking out for their own interests and, ultimately, to failure.
In upcoming episodes we’ll talk about what a healthy work culture can look like, how you can make changes in your own environment and the impact this can have on the people you value so dearly.
And as for that toxic smell coming from that container of sour cream in the back of your fridge? You… might want to deal with that soon.
Thanks for listening to today’s episode.
I can’t wait to connect with you again tomorrow
